This is for the leagues of you thinking, “Hey, how does Jason feel about candy?”
Sour Patch Kids
I generally don’t eat anything with such blatant ties to the doll industry, and usually do my best to steer clear of ingesting candy in the shape of a child. So, when I frantically gobble a whole bag of you in 45 seconds while waiting in line at Walgreens — which I do with shameful frequency — I don’t feel particularly good physically or mentally. Taste, as it turns out, is far more powerful a motivator than morality, guilt, eyesight, health, self-esteem, reason or shame.